Next week, WWE Backstage is Clobbering Time!
CM Punk returns to join the panel for next week, and we also get The Queen, Charlotte Flair! Will Charlotte have her answer in regards to Rhea Ripley’s challenge by then? And what will CM Punk have to say about that and everything else going on in the WWE?
Greg Miller gets ready for Promo School!
Renee says no pressure, but all the pressure. Miller knows, and he wants the judges to know they look lovely today. Renee explains that King Booker, Christian, Ember and McIntyre will be grading Miller’s performance. Any advice real quick? “Don’t screw up.” Anything more, McIntyre? Nope. Booker wants to hear a cool catchphrase or two. “Drink it up, because it’s Miller time!” Greg wants to write these down just in case. Christian branches off that, and says you need to believe what you say because then the fans will believe it. And Ember wants it to be relatable, especially to yourself.
Renee likes that strong advice, but points out Miller needs a target. Miller is picking a fight with Xavier Woods! Aren’t they gamer friends? They are, they work a lot together through YouTube, but Miller plans on taking his “buddy” down a notch! Expose the Woods! Woods is selling something that isn’t true, but everyone drinks it up. Miller prepares himself as Renee heads off stage.
“Xavier Woods. Or should I call you… Austin Creed?” Or perhaps his real real name, “The Worst Part of The New Day.” Miller introduces himself as THE Greg Miller of Kinda Funny Games, but Woods already knows that, right? The year was 2015 when Miller invited Woods to be on HIS E3 stage! And what did Woods do? Talked about games, about how cool Miller was and how they could be friends, and then did what he does best: stole from Miller! Woods took the subs, the industry contacts, “everything that mattered!” Miller thought he could trust Woods when Woods invited Miller to the WWE E-Sports Challenge, but then what happened? Woods steals all the credit when Miller was the host! Miller carried that show on his BACK like Kofi carries Woods every week!
But Woods still gets all the credit. And then what did he do? Woods took the Kinda Funny World Championship from Miller! Has anyone been covering this on this show?! NO! Miller went to visit his wife’s sick mother, and he is STRIPED of the KFG World Championship by “the crooked commissioner,” Xavier Woods! “And then, to add insult to injury,” Woods steals KFG’s idea out of nowhere! Now there’s an UpUpDownDown World Championship?! It shows up all the time on YouTube, but does Miller get a shot at it? The Game Awards’ #1 trending gamer! The South by Southwest Most Entertaining Online Personality! Greg Miller, “one of the coolest dudes in video games.” But no, no title shot.
And then Woods gets hurt! Owie owie big toe hurts. Woods does all his YouTube gaming stuff that aren’t kinda funny! Miller tells Woods what’s going to happen now: Miller will make his own history and his own plans. March 27th, 2020. The Allstate Arena in Miller’s hometown of Chicago, Illinois! Mrs. Miller’s Baby Boy is coming home, and if Woods is any kind of man, he’ll be there, bad foot or not. They will have a Nidhogg II single match, and if Miller wins, he becomes #1 Contender to the UUDD World title. If he loses, which won’t happen, Miller will tweet to his one MILLION followers (which is more than Woods but Woods will try to steal them soon enough), and for an entire month, that people should sub to UUDD. But if Woods no-shows, then it’s forfeit! That’s fair, isn’t it?
But for those thinking, “That’s extortion!” Miller learned a lesson a long time ago. “It’s better to be Greg than great.” Mic drop! Renee loves how Miller served that one up! Miller got Renee to hate Woods now! How did no one know this?! Woods having three names is a sign. But now, to the grades!
Booker knew it, it WAS Miller Time. Miller thanks the king for his compliment. Booker likes that it was real and relatable. B+, his highest grade yet. McIntyre enjoyed how intense it was, but it went long. It kept his attention, at least, and the challenge made was great. So B- to stay with Booker. Christian doesn’t say a word, but he’s given Miller a C+!? Harsh! But then Christian explains, he agrees with McIntyre. It could’ve been stronger but had a great finish. Miller was in control but he was taking his time getting there. But sometimes, a promo without an in-person target is hard because you have to do it all yourself. But the length risks losing people’s attention. Leave them wanting more.
Finally, Ember feels her part in this year long build behind the scenes given her time on UUDD, and feels how real and important this is to Miller. Ember does agree with the other points on length, and adds that there is an intensity level he needs to keep his eye on. But all that said, it was completely believable, so Ember gives a B+! A great balance, great feedback, and Miller had fun. Booker wants him to get that beard gloss. But with Promo School over for the night, WWE Backstage will shift gears to analyzing The Viper’s promo from last night. What grades do they give Randy Orton after the break?
